Sometimes my head is spinning like mad. I can’t stop all the thoughts that go through my mind. I wish i could. But memories keep surfacing (finally, they’ve been burried too deep). I’m happy that i finally remember them, but why do they come back when i want to sleep?
Last night i lay awake from 4 am. The night before that i was awake from 1 am til 4 am. I then finally fell asleep, but had very weird and anxious dreams about mail somehow not being delivered or envelopes running back to me when they should go to the person i wanted to write. Even BookCrossing books had hidden messages in them. Last night i was dreaming that i was dreaming. Somehow that ended up being a nightmare. Hadn’t had one for a long time. I think it might be the new job thing and a lot of other things coming together.
Don’t get me wrong, i love those things coming together right now. I believe it’s time for them to resurface, just the insomnia that it causes is hard to deal with. I’m really glad to have my new job and the opportunities it gives me. It might take some time to fit in, but i believe i can make it here. I love it here.
Now there’s just the matter of stopping my head from spinning and trying to get a good night sleep. That would be very welcome.
